People who live great lives never know what they're getting into ahead of time -- they just manage to exist in a way that fascinates other people.
Whenever I've dreamed ahead, or looked forward to something, it never turns out like I imagined. Real experiences don't care what we want.
And here comes the close-out for the year 2015. My debut year that wasn't. A year that did not go as planned, so much so that I made a list:
1) I had a bizarre and random health scare that directly impacted work.
2) I lost my son's day care through particularly unfortunate circumstances.
3) There has been a lot of loss around me -- the kind that would have broken lesser humans, including myself. And it brought back some feelings from the past that I'd much rather have kept back there.
4) I bounced between feeling like the best and worst father on a daily basis.
5) Oh yeah, there was that one thing about my book losing its publisher. That hit me like a bag of poop to the face.
So yeah, 2015 threw me a lot of surprises. And these weren't so much surprise-party-on-your-multiple-of-ten-birthday surprises so much as pigeon-dumped-on-your-shoulder-while-walking-under-the-El-tracks surprises.
I got to thinking about that list. I drew an imaginary T-chart in my mind's eye, and put it in the left column. Then I added things to the right column to balance it out.
1) I'm still standing at work and giving all I can to my students. Parents had kind words for me at parent-teacher conferences. How bad can things be when people are going out of their way to assure you things are okay?
2) My parents jumped in to help with daycare, and my son is doing better than ever with so much individual love and attention. Many parents can't afford daycare, and don't have parents capable of helping.
3) The people I've watched experience loss are healing in their own personal ways. They will make it through the darkness, and while they won't be unscathed, none of us are at the end of the day.
4) Maybe it's possible that I make both good and bad parental decisions sometimes, and that's the best parents can expect from themselves.
5) It sucks to lose a publisher, but it's really great to land a new one. It makes for a great debut story. And I still have the Fall Fifteeners, and Fearless Fifteeners, and Sweet Sixteens backing me up every step of the way. The kidlit community rocks my face off.
Maybe 2015 didn't go the way I wanted it to at all, and that's okay.
Mike Grosso is the author of I AM DRUMS, a debut contemporary middle grade novel for musicians of all ages. It was orphaned due to the closing of Egmont USA, but has found a new home at Clarion Books and an updated release date of September 6, 2016. The Fall Fifteeners have been nice enough to let him hang out even though he's technically a sixteener now.
You can visit Mike's website here or follow him on Twitter @mgrossoauthor.
You're the best, Mike. Behind you every step!
ReplyDeleteI know, right? One second we were driving along... POW!!! she was DOA, I with a head injury. Go figure. Dear, if you think hard, you'll realize 1-outta-1 croaks. We must prepare BEFORE HAND, girl. Lemme fill-you-up withe avant-gardeness and wisdom necessary to achieve Seventh-Heaven...
ReplyDeleteWanna find-out the fax, Jak, in a wurld fulla MissKonceptions? Wanna wiseabove to help a 'Plethora Of Wurdz' which are look'n for a new home in your novelty?? Yay!
Q: But [gulp] can anyone tell me the difference between K2 and IQ? A: Nthn. In Heaven, we gitt'm both for eternity HA! Need a few more thots, ideers, wild wurdz (whoa, Nelly! easy, girl!) or ironclad iconoclasms? Voila!!
VERBUM SAT SAPIENTI: As an ex-writer of the sassy, savvy, schizophenia we all go thro in this lifelong demise, I wanna help U.S. git past the whorizontal more!ass! we're in (Latin: words to [the] wise)...
"This finite existence is only a test, son," God Almighty told me in my coma. "Far beyond thy earthly tempest is where you'll find tangible, corpulent eloquence". Lemme tella youse without d'New Joisey accent...
I actually saw Seventh-Heaven when we died: you couldn't GET! any moe curly, party-hardy-endorphins, extravagantly-surplus-lush Upstairs (in [the] end without end -Saint Augustine) when my o-so-beautifull, brilliant, bombastic girly passed-away due to those wry, sardonic satires.
"Those who are wise will shine as brightly as the expanse of the Heavens, and those who have instructed many in uprightousness as bright as stars for all eternity" -Daniel 12:3, NJB
Here's also what the prolific, exquisite GODy sed: 'the more you shall honor Me, the more I shall bless you' -the Infant Jesus of Prague.
Go gitt'm, girl. You're incredible. See you Upstairs. I won't be joining'm in the nasty Abyss where Isis prowls
thesuperseedoftime.blogspot.com
infowars.com
-YOUTHwitheTRUTH
-------------------------------
PS Need summore unique, uncivilized, useless names? Lemme gonna gitcha started, brudda:
Oak Woods, Franky Sparks, Athena Noble, Autumn Rose, Faith Bishop, Dolly Martin, Willow Rhodes, Cocoa Major, Roman Stone, Bullwark Burnhart, Magnus Wilde, Kardiak Arrest, Will Wright, Goldy Silvers, Penelope Summers, Sophie Sharp, Violet Snow, Lizzy Roach, BoxxaRoxx, Aunty Dotey, Romero Stark, Zacharia Neptoo, Mercurio Morrissey, Fritz & Felix Franz, Victor Payne, Isabella Silverstein, Mercedes Kennedy, Redding Rust, Phoenix Martini, Ivy Squire, Sauer Wolfe, Yankee Cooky, -blessed b9 ...shake well B4 use!
God blessa youse
(trust-N-Jesus)
-Fr. Sarducci, ol SNL
I know, right? One second we were driving along... POW!!! she was DOA, I with a head injury. Go figure. Dear, if you think hard, you'll realize 1-outta-1 croaks. We must prepare BEFORE HAND, girl. Lemme fill-you-up withe avant-gardeness and wisdom necessary to achieve Seventh-Heaven...
ReplyDeleteWanna find-out the fax, Jak, in a wurld fulla MissKonceptions? Wanna wiseabove to help a 'Plethora Of Wurdz' which are look'n for a new home in your novelty?? Yay!
Q: But [gulp] can anyone tell me the difference between K2 and IQ? A: Nthn. In Heaven, we gitt'm both for eternity HA! Need a few more thots, ideers, wild wurdz (whoa, Nelly! easy, girl!) or ironclad iconoclasms? Voila!!
VERBUM SAT SAPIENTI: As an ex-writer of the sassy, savvy, schizophenia we all go thro in this lifelong demise, I wanna help U.S. git past the whorizontal more!ass! we're in (Latin: words to [the] wise)...
"This finite existence is only a test, son," God Almighty told me in my coma. "Far beyond thy earthly tempest is where you'll find tangible, corpulent eloquence". Lemme tella youse without d'New Joisey accent...
I actually saw Seventh-Heaven when we died: you couldn't GET! any moe curly, party-hardy-endorphins, extravagantly-surplus-lush Upstairs (in [the] end without end -Saint Augustine) when my o-so-beautifull, brilliant, bombastic girly passed-away due to those wry, sardonic satires.
"Those who are wise will shine as brightly as the expanse of the Heavens, and those who have instructed many in uprightousness as bright as stars for all eternity" -Daniel 12:3, NJB
Here's also what the prolific, exquisite GODy sed: 'the more you shall honor Me, the more I shall bless you' -the Infant Jesus of Prague.
Go gitt'm, girl. You're incredible. See you Upstairs. I won't be joining'm in the nasty Abyss where Isis prowls
thesuperseedoftime.blogspot.com
infowars.com
-YOUTHwitheTRUTH
-------------------------------
PS Need summore unique, uncivilized, useless names? Lemme gonna gitcha started, brudda:
Oak Woods, Franky Sparks, Athena Noble, Autumn Rose, Faith Bishop, Dolly Martin, Willow Rhodes, Cocoa Major, Roman Stone, Bullwark Burnhart, Magnus Wilde, Kardiak Arrest, Will Wright, Goldy Silvers, Penelope Summers, Sophie Sharp, Violet Snow, Lizzy Roach, BoxxaRoxx, Aunty Dotey, Romero Stark, Zacharia Neptoo, Mercurio Morrissey, Fritz & Felix Franz, Victor Payne, Isabella Silverstein, Mercedes Kennedy, Redding Rust, Phoenix Martini, Ivy Squire, Sauer Wolfe, Yankee Cooky, -blessed b9 ...shake well B4 use!
God blessa youse
(trust-N-Jesus)
-Fr. Sarducci, ol SNL